“Don’t Leave, Baby. Think of the Polar Bears!”

I wonder if this story means that we’ll see Greenpeace coming out in favor of the Federal Marriage Amendment now?

Divorce is not just a family matter. It exacts a serious toll on the environment by boosting the energy and water consumption of those who used to live together, according to a study by two Michigan State University researchers.

The analysis found that cohabiting couples and families around the globe use resources more efficiently than households that have split up. The researchers calculated that in 2005, divorced American households used between 42 and 61 percent more resources per person than before they separated, spending 46 percent more per person on electricity and 56 percent more on water.

Seriously. How ridiculous. I wouldn’t give you a plugged nickel for someone who thought the most important reason to have stable and lasting families in our society was to harm the environment less. Sheesh.

And of course divorce causes more of a drain on the environment. A family goes from living in one house to living in two or more houses. You’ll also find that single people used more resources less efficiently than before they were married. There you go. Mystery solved.

I can’t help but wonder where a report like this is leading. These things never come without a policy suggestion and the only real conclusion for someone who thinks the government has to stop global warming today, if not actually yesterday, is to have the government mandate marriage. That would be a giant leap into Fascistville for a group of folks who have been living on its ourskirts for a few years now. But it only makes logical sense. If we can completely reorder the economies of the largest nations in the world, marriage is an easy one to tackle. After all, it’s not been that long since we stopped doing the arranged marriage thing. Heck, some communities in America still do it and it is fairly common elsewhere in the world. What better raeson to sacrifice your lifelong happiness than for Sweet Mama Gaia? That ought to make the Aggressive Nannies of the Left happy as clams in a government-protected clam sanctuary.

Today they pass laws against smoking and eating certain tasty foods and drinks. Tomorrow, who’s to say what the little control freaks will tell us?

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Category: Featured, Oh the Climate, It is A-Changin'