Scientists Seek to Create Life. Herbert West Unavailable for Comment
WASHINGTON (AP) – Around the world, a handful of scientists are trying to create life from scratch and they’re getting closer.
Experts expect an announcement within three to 10 years from someone in the now little-known field of “wet artificial life.”
“It’s going to be a big deal and everybody’s going to know about it,” said Mark Bedau, chief operating officer of ProtoLife of Venice, Italy, one of those in the race. “We’re talking about a technology that could change our world in pretty fundamental ways—in fact, in ways that are impossible to predict.”
Oh, I’m quite sure everybody’s going to know about it, approximately three seconds after their “wet artificial life” swallows Italy and oozes its way into the Atlantic heading west.
But, hey, nothing at all to worry about. We know exactly how safe stuff like trying to create life from lifelessness is, right?
And several scientists believe man-made life forms will one day offer the potential for solving a variety of problems, from fighting diseases to locking up greenhouse gases to eating toxic waste.
And that whole overpopulation conundrum? Consider that one solved, too!
Well, I for one welcome my soon-to-arrive Shoggoth Overlords! As a trusted blogger, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their ancient Cyclopean ruins. Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!
Pay no attention to this man. He’s obviously an agent of early insurrection. Why, he even wants to stop Global Warming no doubt so the planet will cool dramatically, which we all know killed the Elder Things who brought to Shoggoths to Earth a billion years ago. His book? Faugh. Neptune? GodSquids? Obviously he’s confusing the Shoggoths with the Star-spawn of Cthulhu who could never have come from anywhere but “cosmic infinity”, which is nowhere near Neptune. May his engulfment come swiftly.
And to think, H.P. Lovecraft was right on top of this story a century ago.
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Category: Hey, Mr. Science Guy!
