"Leave All Blades Behind"

| December 3, 2005 | 7 Replies

This is, without a doubt, the most gratingly stupid name for a law I’ve ever seen in my life.

A Democratic Party lawmaker says a U.S. government decision to end a ban on scissors and certain other sharp objects airline passengers are permitted to take on aircraft would encourage terrorists. Massachusetts Congressman Ed Markey is vowing to fight the relaxation of restrictions that went into effect following the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, while another lawmaker agrees with the plan, which is due to be announced Friday.

Congressman Markey says he will introduce legislation, which he calls the “Leave All Blades Behind Act” if the government does not reverse its decision.

Obviously, Congressman Markey needs to hire someone with an imagination to come up wihtbetter names for his proposals. This one didn’t make me want to rush out and support it. It made me want to call Ed Markey a knucklehead and write the derisive blog post.

But aside from the name of the Act, it’s purpose is likewise laughable. Apparently, Markey’s one of those folks who believes that nothing changed at all in this country after 9/11. He honestly believes that a couple terrorists with scirroes would be able to overcome a planeload of Americans, some of whom would be carrying scissors themselves.

See, Congressman Markey, unless the terrorists outnumber the passengers, the chances are slim to none that they will have an insurmountable “small blade gap”. It is far more likely that, armed with their own small blades, the passengers will overwhelm the would-be hijackers and beat them to paste.

That is, unless the Congressman continues to treat US air passengers like helpless children incapable of defending themselves with even the most unweidly weapon. He prefers to remember American i the days when we were all commanded to let hijackers do whatever they wanted insted of rising up and fighting back, even if that meant driving the plane into the ground.

Hopefully we’ll all look past the silly name to the silly and patronizing heart of Markey’s proposal and demand that he treat us like adults.

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